Bystar stumbled up to
the shack, panting. This one?
In his head Mercury's
answer rumbled like a twelve horse carriage. Get closer, you fool! You're
not seeing the letters clearly. Honestly, I don't know how you survive with
your pathetic little mustelid eyes!
Bystar sighed and
dragged himself forward. Better?
There was silence for
a moment while he dutifully flicked his eyes back and forth over the text that
topped the door, concentrating as hard as he could on the shapes.
This is it, Mercury pronounced. Now in,
and don't come out until he's hired you and agreed to the task.
Bystar paused to lick
his sore paws and shake some of the dust out of his coat. His tongue flicked
over his nose and he took a deep breath. This was it.
He scratched at the
door as loudly as possible. After a moment it opened and he was faced with a
pair of feet.
"Hello?"
said a deep voice. "Who's there?"
"Down
here," said Bystar, looking up - and up - into a face almost hairier than
his own.
The feet jumped.
"Ah. Hello there, little fella." The feet shuffled, and a pair of
knees came into view, followed by a torso and last of all the face. "What
kin I do fo' you?"
Bystar licked his
nose. "Uh, I'm here to see... Roy."
The man's eyebrow
shot up towards his hairline. "Roy? What do you be wantin' with Roy?"
Bystar shook his head
and cowered against the concrete.
"Ah, never mind.
I'll take ye to 'im. 'e's out back. Do you want to walk, or do ye want me to
carry ye?"
"I'll walk,
thanks," said Bystar, raising a tentative foot.
The man stood.
"Righto then. This way." He held the door open as Bystar scurried
through, then closed it with a slam.
Bystar stared across
the large room, filled with raucous noise, people dashing back and forth,
laughing, shouting.
"Don't mind the
noise." The hairy man's voice boomed down to him. "'s always like
this day after a recruitin' picnic."
Bystar trotted close
by the man's heels, wary of getting stepped on in the commotion. His ears lay
pinned back against his head and he tried desperately to block out the noise.
"What's that, a
walking mop? We called the cleaners, but they said they wouldn't be here till
this afternoon!" Laughter bounced around the room.
Bystar cringed low
against the ground and slunk after the feet.
"Ah, leave 'im
alone!" said the hairy man. "'e's 'ere to see Roy."
A sharp crack echoed
from one corner. Bystar jumped.
The hairy man
grinned. "Don't worry. 's just Fenlay, showing off for the new
recruits."
Bystar looked in the
direction indicated and saw a group of young-faced people sporting bright
coloured armbands surrounding a sparkly, pointy hat. The group shifted and
Bystar realised that the hat was actually perched on the head of an odd looking
man, short and clean-shaven.
"You
coming?"
Bystar jumped as a
boot nudged his side. He looked up at the hairy fellow. "Sorry,
coming."
The hairy fellow lead
him out to the back of the building, stopping where the paving crumbled to a
halt and became a sparsely-grassed yard, fenced with old, silvery pails and
bordered by large trees whose branches bent low and swept the ground. The
fellow nodded towards a solitary figure on the other side of the yard near the
shed. "He's over there."
Bystar nodded and
licked his lips. "Uh, yeah, great. Thanks."
The fellow grunted
and stomped back inside.
Bystar slunk across
the yard, weaving in and out of the assorted strange objects that littered the
remains of the lawn. He jerked to a stop and doubled up as a particularly
virulent scent reached his nose. He sneezed and gulped, then sneezed again.
What was that? His eyes began to water and he dragged himself aside.
Whatever it was, he wasn't that interested in finding out. He sneezed
again and moaned.
Oh come off it, said Mercury. It stinks, move
on.
Bystar shook his
head. "Try...ing..." His head spun and he sneezed again.
Something gripped his
neck and lifted him off the ground. The air cleared and he inhaled in gasps.
"Hello,"
said a voice.
Bystar rubbed his
eyes. Slowly they stopped watering, and with a final blink he could see again.
The ground rocked back and forth several feet below him. He shrieked and curled
his legs up underneath his body.
"Aw, there now, I've
got you." An arm came around underneath him and cradled him against a warm
body. Bystar looked up into a face framed by wavey blonde hair. "You
okay?" A finger tickled his chin.
Bystar nodded.
"And what's a
pretty little thing like you doing out here?"
"See...
Roy..." Bystar panted.
The girl stared at
him for a second, then seemed to accept what she saw. She hugged him tight.
"Of course. I'll take you right over." She carried him over to where
Roy was picking up some of the strange items from the ground and placed him on
an old table. "Roy," she said, "there's someone here to see
you."
As Roy straightened
the girl darted off giggling. Roy stared after her for a moment, then shook his
head and turned towards the table.
"You
again," he said. "Now look, ferret, I don't know who you think you
are-"
"Oh my, of
course!" Bystar grinned. "How rude of me not to introduce myself. My
name is Bystar Marmo Stor Flale. Most people settle for Bystar." He leant
back on his haunches and gave a mock bow, which he finished by twirling his
whiskers between two claws.
"Bystar,"
said Roy in a monotone. "Right."
"So," said
Bystar. "You've had time to think about it... What do you say?" He
watched as Roy froze, staring off into the distance. Bystar sighed. He'd done
this at the barbeque, too, and it had taken nearly a full five minutes to bring
him back to earth.
Bystar was just
considering biting Roy on the leg when Roy sighed.
"I don't think
so." He shook his head. "There's no business for randomly offing evil
overlords, these days."
"But he's evil,"
said Bystar, aghast. "You can't just leave him up there, ruling evilly
over the people, foisting his evil plans on the innocents of the world."
Roy leveled a look at
the ferret. "Actually, yes I can." He picked up the metal contraption.
"These days planned demonstrations, rallies and ... tend to work better
than assassination attempts."
Bystar sighed.
"Well, can I at least hang around with you guys then?"
Roy raised an
eyebrow. "You want to join the Good Guys Against Evil society?"
Bystar nodded.
Roy rolled his eyes.
"Whatever. Just make sure you go to the secretary and pay your fee,
okay?"
Bystar looked
affronted. "I'm a ferret, how am I supposed to pay fees?"
"You're the one
who wants to join. You figure it out." Roy glanced at the ferret. "No
thieving though. We're watching you."
"Come now,
that's not very nice!" said Bystar. "Surely you can afford to make an
exception for one such as me. Especially since I come with... valuable
information." Bystar rubbed against Roy's leg.
Roy shook his head
and stepped towards the door. "Actually, no. We're low on funds. We could
really use your fee, actually."
Bystar froze.
Need cash, do
they? Mercury
spoke in his head. Well, we can help them there. Tell him about the Key.
What? said Bystar. What's that got
to do with the price of membership in GGAE?
Everything.
But you're the one
that needs the Key. How's it supposed to benefit him?
It's not. But he
doesn't have to know that.
"Are you
alright?"
Bystar glanced up to
see Roy looking at him with a strange expression on his face. "Uh, yeah,
fine." He sidled up to Roy. "So, you could use my membership fee,
yes?"
Roy looked at him
consideringly, then nodded. "I don't know if you've noticed, but Deviran's
doing a pretty decent job of running the place these days. People aren't
exactly racing out to donate to us any more."
Bystar nodded.
"I see. So." He paused, waiting to see if he held Roy's attention.
"If I told you I had a way for you to get your hands on a large sum of
cash, would you be interested?"
Roy looked skeptical.
"We're strictly a legal association."
Bystar arranged his
features to look offended. "I have no idea what you mean."
"A ferret tells
me he has a way to get his hands on a large sum of cash, I'm not exactly going
to assume he has a bank account he's willing to donate," said Roy.
Bystar shuffled his
feet. What do I tell him? he sent to Mercury.
Don't worry. What
we're suggesting isn't strictly illegal.
He shook his ears.
"Well, what I'm suggesting isn't precisely illegal."
Roy rolled his eyes
as he turned away. "Righto," he said over his shoulder. "I'll
talk to you later then, shall I?"
Mercury, help!
He's not listening! Bystar felt a panic rise in his stomach.
Well do something
then! Mercury
screeched into his mind.
He clapped a paw to
his head. Like what?
Sing a song, do a
jig? Do I look like I care? Just get him back here!
Roy was nearly to the
back door of the clubhouse.
Bystar! I don't
care what you do, but if you do not make him listen to you I will do painful
and horrible thing to you. What are you, a ferret or a rat?
Bystar grimaced. I'm
not a rat!
Yes you are. No
good useless rat. I should have sent one of your fleas out there instead.
No! Bystar bounded across the grass
and crashed into the back of Roy's foot just as it was ducking through the
door. "Ooph!" Bystar gasped as the door slammed shut around his ribs.
"Help," he said hoarsely, "please?"
Roy kept walking.
"Roy!" A high-pitched
voice cut across the general din in the room. "Look what you've done! Oh
the poor little fellow..."
A pair of hands
scooped Bystar up and out of the doorway and snuggled him in close. Bystar
groaned. Not another girl.
He glanced up. This
one was a brunette, long waves of hair trailing down her shoulders front and
back and tickling him behind the ear. He flicked his ear.
"Roy Stanson,
stop right there!" said the girl, striding over to Roy. "Look what
you've done. This poor little creature was nearly decapitated because you
didn't watch what you were doing." She glared at Roy, and Bystar could feel
the anger steaming off her.
Roy held his hands up
defensively. "Don't blame me, I didn't even know he was there! Last time I
looked he was on the other side of the yard."
Bystar looked back in
time to see the girl narrow her eyes. "You know him, then?"
Bystar turned to Roy,
who gazed back consideringly. They stared at each other for a minute, then
Bystar licked his nose. "He knows me. I'm trying to help him, but he won't
listen."
The girl yelped and
jumped, and Bystar squeaked as the floor danced horribly near. He shot out a
paw full of claws and scarpered up onto her shoulder.
"You... you can
speak?"
Bystar nodded, trying
not to laugh as the girl simultaneously tried to peer closely at him on her
shoulder and tried to back away.
"Talk?"
muttered Roy. "He never shuts up."
The girl shot Roy a
glare. "You knew he could talk, and you didn't warn me?!"
"What was I
supposed to say? 'I'm not sure if I want to admit to knowing the ferret, but
either way, watch out, he talks.' I don't think so."
"Well you could
have said something!"
"I-"
"Ahem."
Bystar rubbed an ear against his leg. "Charming as this conversation is,
it's not strictly relevant to the point at hand."
Roy and the girl
stared at him. "Point?" said the girl.
"Yes, point. I'm
trying to give Roy a hand here, knowing he's short on funds at the moment, but
he doesn't seem to want to listen to me."
The girl shot Roy
another glare and he turned red. "I... It's not that... It's just..."
The girl raised an
eyebrow and Roy fell silent. She turned to Bystar. "I'll listen to
you," she said. "What's your idea?"
"Well,"
said Bystar, licking a foot to conceal his happy grin. "It's dead simple,
really. There's this thing, an artifact, well, it's called the Key of Power.
It's a Powerful Artifact of Doom. Fetch a fortune with the right buyers."
Roy gave him a
skeptical look. "Oh come off it. PADs went out years ago."
"Yeah, well,
this is an old model." He stared defiantly at Roy.
"Oh come on,
Roy," said the girl. "Why couldn't there by an old Artifact hanging
around? It's not like it's unheard of."
Roy expression
changed and he seemed thoughtful. "But what would old Deviran want with a
PAD? He's not exactly the traditional type."
"No, but his
palace is, everyone knows that the last guy was as traditional as they
come."
The girl had a
serious expression on her face. "That's true, Roy. Vlardir was into that
sort of thing big time."
"True,"
said Roy.
Bystar suppressed a
grin. Thank goodness for the girl. A few more minutes and Roy would be eating
out of his palm. "And that's why the Artifact is the Key - 'scuse pun - to
your problems. Deviran's not the least bit interested in something like that,
so he doesn't bother to keep it under guard. And he's evil, after all, so
nicking it off him is like doing the world a favour."
Roy chewed on his
lip. "I don't know about the whole stealing thing, still."
"Oh don't be
ridiculous," said the girl, putting her hands on her hips. "I don't
care how good a job he's doing. He's the evil overlord. We're the Good
Guys Against Evil. Against. It's in our job description to take him
down."
Bystar scratched
frantically at his ear. Must. Not. Grin.
Don't get cocky, said Mercury. He hasn't
agreed yet. Try using the words 'defeat evil' and 'free the downtrodden'. They
really seemed to work for him last time.
Last time? said Bystar. Last time he
said no, in case you've forgotten that minor detail. Which is why I am here
again now!
Just do it, said Mercury.
Bystar sighed. He
turned to Roy and tried to be upbeat and peppy. "So, how bout it? You up
for defeating evil and freeing the downtrodden?" He gave Roy what he hoped
was a hopeful look.
Roy screwed up one
eye. For a moment Bystar held his breath, sure that Roy would say no. He opened
his mouth.
Leave it! said Mercury, and he snapped his
mouth shut.
"Oh Roy, come
on!" said the girl. "Can't you see it's important to him?"
Roy sighed.
"Alright. I'll do it."
"Ye-ah!"
Bystar punched the air. "Atta boy, Roy. You won't regret it."
Roy looked at him
sideways. "Don't make promises you can't keep," he said, and stalked
off.
"Don't mind
him," said the girl. "He just gets narky when he doesn't come up with
a good idea himself." She stretched her arm out over a bench. "You
hungry?" she said.
Bystar nodded and
scampered down her arm.
"Here you
go," she said, tearing a chunk off a nearby sandwich and handing it to
him.
Who was eating out
of whose palm?
cackled Mercury.
Bystar jumped and
accidentally spat out the bread.
"Something
wrong?" asked the girl.
Bystar reluctantly
licked up the bread. "No," he said, Mercury's voice bouncing off the
inside of his skull. "Not a thing."
